成人小说亚洲一区二区三区,亚洲国产精品一区二区三区,国产精品成人精品久久久,久久综合一区二区三区,精品无码av一区二区,国产一级a毛一级a看免费视频,欧洲uv免费在线区一二区,亚洲国产欧美中日韩成人综合视频,国产熟女一区二区三区五月婷小说,亚洲一区波多野结衣在线

立即打開
The inner gaze

The inner gaze

2009年06月12日

????Self-knowledge is crucial, particularly in a tough economy.

????By Alexander Stein

????(Fortune Small Business) -- We've all been there: a crisis erupts in your business, and because you're the boss, everyone turns to you for a solution. The little voice in your head wails, "Don't look at me! I have no idea!" To make matters worse, you think the whole world can see your inner lack of confidence.

????So how do you fix it? Meet Andrew S., 49, president of a New York City firm that manages social service organizations (I've altered certain details to conceal his identity). Guided by a strong sense of civic responsibility and the desire to help others, Andrew seems ideally suited to his work. And the business has performed well during his 15 years at the helm.

????Interestingly, Andrew hired me as an executive coach after receiving an extremely positive annual review from his board. "Everyone thinks I'm doing great -- my staff, my board, the agencies that hire my company, people I do fund-raising with," he told me. "But I don't agree. I know I'm underperforming as a leader, and I feel like a fraud."

????Like most entrepreneurs these days, Andrew is anxious about the economy. "My client agencies are battered by dwindling funding, causing them to scale back their use of my company," he said. "Of course, this comes just as their clients need them more than ever."

????Andrew identifies deeply with the people he serves; he feels their pain, and he's experiencing some guilt about being successful when so many others are failing. But would he be just as stressed in a boom economy?

????I think the answer is yes. Andrew's issues transcend the business cycle. Beneath his smart, generous, unflappable exterior lurks massive insecurity. In Andrew's imagination everyone around him thinks (or will soon discover) that he's really worthless, conniving and self-involved. "I can't believe I'm not transparent," he told me with obvious discomfort.

????The technical term for this is projection. Andrew attributes his negative self-image to the people around him. He assumes that his colleagues and clients are perpetually on the verge of attacking him, when in reality he's attacking himself. As a result, it hardly matters whether or not Andrew faces a real, objective threat. The entire emotional game is taking place inside his head.

????There's no Pentium undo button for this one. Andrew's template for the fraudulent leader comes from his father. Andrew describes him as respected and authoritative in the outside world but passive, unpredictable and rageful at home. Andrew's mother was depressed and narcissistic, he says; she leaned on him for emotional support without ever praising his efforts. At school he struggled socially but managed to conceal his anger and timidity behind a mask of stoic resolve.

????In short, Andrew's history conditioned him to associate authority with duplicity. That's why he feels like a false leader today. But by acknowledging and understanding what's going on in his head, he can learn how to handle his emotions so that he can stay on point in his job.

????Step One: Andrew needs to give himself credit for his advantages. His past may have been unhappy, and it may have made it difficult for him to distinguish real threats from imaginary ones. But his early relationships also prepared him to succeed in his chosen career. Having lived through an emotional battering, he knows how to lead a business dedicated to helping others survive difficult times.

????Step Two: Andrew must understand that his feelings are normal and acceptable. Everyone feels fraudulent sometimes; that's part of being human.

????Step Three: Dialogue. Andrew has been trapped inside himself. He grew up with nobody listening to him and has made helping others his profession. His corrosive projections are generated partly, I think, by the fact that he wants the people in his life to know him better. It helps to air out these projections with me, rather than at work.

????Self-examination is hard work. It's also worth the investment, for both you and your business. No company can thrive under misaligned leadership. In a tough economy, it's especially important for entrepreneurs to focus on the business issue that matters most -- themselves.

????Alexander Stein, Ph.D., is a practicing psychoanalyst in New York City and a principal in the Boswell Group, a consulting firm.

掃碼打開財富Plus App
亚洲啪AV永久无码精品放毛片| 欧美乱妇高清无乱码免费| 国产又色又爽又黄又刺激| 亚洲国产成人精品女人久久久| 99热在线精品免费播放6| 久久国产乱子伦精品免费女| 毛片免费视频肛交颜射免费视频| 欧美与黑人午夜性猛交久| 久久永久免费人妻精品直播| 精品国产一区二区三区久久影院| 欧美日韩在线第一页免费观看| 人妻精品久久无码区洗澡| 尤物无毒不卡在线观看| 无码精品久久一区二区三区| 免费无码av一区二区三区| 天堂无码电影在线| 中文字幕一级片无码高清| 99福利资源久久福利资源| 精品人妻人人做人人爽| ?愛妃?国产一区二区三区视频精品| 无码专区狠狠躁躁天天躁| 欧美成人午夜精品剧场| 一级黄色 片免费网站| 亚洲精品无码久久久久去Q| 国产成人精品亚洲一区| 亚洲乱理伦片在线观看中字| 男人扒开女人下面舔的AV | 国产自啪精品视频网站丝袜| 国产成人精品午夜2022| 亚洲Aⅴ无码乱码精品国产福利| 少妇被粗大的猛烈进出VA视频| 亚洲成a人片在线观看中文app| 久久精品国产亚洲AV果冻传媒| 最新国产成人精品区在线观看| 日韩精品中文字幕一区二区三区| 欧美国产在线观看综合| 日韩永久在线观看免费视频| 久久精品无码一区二区三区| 人妻无码中文久久久久专区| 亚洲无人区午夜福利码高清完整版 | 国产黄大片在线观看画质优化|