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你知道什么才是你真正想要的嗎?請先了解這七個詞

Elaina Giolando
2018-06-04

對于人生感到迷茫的年輕人,可以了解一下這7個重要理念。

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Photograph by Ezra Bailey via Getty Images

我每個月都會輔導十幾位來自全球各地的年輕人,他們對人生感到迷茫,也不知道如何更好地規(guī)劃職業(yè)生涯。指導中我發(fā)現(xiàn)了不少共性,也藉此匯總了一些指導意見,以幫助那些有意樹立人生目標的人士。以下是歸納出的幾個主要理念,我將其概括為7個單詞。

1. 欲望

我的大多數(shù)客戶都不知道自己想要什么。有些人編出個故事告訴自己正在做什么,打算做什么,但其實并不清楚自己真正想要的是什么。

想知道我們真正要什么,就得停止腦中的自我審查,別再想著看似崇高或榮耀的答案,或是出于經(jīng)濟原因的選擇或是家人的期望。我奉勸所有人:將所有不相關(guān)的事情拋之腦后,數(shù)三下之后用最快的速度回答“我想要什么?”十有八九,這就是你想要的答案。

你只能自己弄清楚想要什么,別人是愛莫能助的。第一步就是要毫不猶豫地找出來。

2. 恐懼

如果還是無法找到人生目標,不妨想想害怕什么。我堅信,恐懼能告訴我們應(yīng)該去做什么,最成功的人士都會直面自己的恐懼。

與大多數(shù)人一樣,我身邊的人都會害怕,而且是害怕很多東西。在恐懼面前不能畏首畏尾,應(yīng)該迎面而上果斷擊敗。應(yīng)該持這樣的態(tài)度:了解恐懼可以加深對自我和周圍世界的了解、學著面對恐懼時如何行事會受益匪淺。

去找能讓人成長的領(lǐng)域,當你真正害怕時,成長得最快。

3. 服務(wù)

如果還是收效不大,就多找?guī)椭说臋C會。除了金錢之外,你還有什么可以與世界分享?你有什么可以傳授給他人?有沒有什么地方,你的存在可以幫助到別人?

大多數(shù)不幸福的人都活得很自私,往往忽略了最簡單的問題:就在今天,就在此刻,我能給予他人什么?一旦你感到失落,去給予,去分享,去愛。

4. 聯(lián)系

我發(fā)現(xiàn),很多對生活感到迷茫的人都沒有積極、有技巧地與他人聯(lián)系。我發(fā)現(xiàn)他人的需求之后,下一步就是列出清單,找出所有能夠幫助他/她實現(xiàn)這一目標的人,然后開始一步步地聯(lián)系這些人,請每個人施以援手或是大膽地將他/她的才華展示出來。

然而,大多數(shù)人都不敢做。要想做到,我們得找到合適的方法,價值觀也要明確,第一步就要鍛煉自信心。害怕與興趣領(lǐng)域的重要人士聯(lián)系正是成功路上的絆腳石。

5. 靜思

人們經(jīng)常嚴重低估生活中沉默和靜思的價值。他們每天開著車疲于奔命,攝取大量信息和外界刺激,但從沒有留出時間靜下心梳理。

我建議身邊每一位同事每天臨睡前完全靜下心來,坐半個小時。在這段神圣的時間里關(guān)掉所有的設(shè)備,穿好睡衣,平復一下思緒,回顧一下當天,在內(nèi)心深處消化一下白天經(jīng)歷的事情。在身體輾轉(zhuǎn)心緒不寧時,人們無法聽到內(nèi)心的聲音,因此必須采取以下三個步驟:停止活動,靜下心來,傾聽心聲。每天堅持。

6. 行動

大多數(shù)人都在裝著行動,所以你也一樣。你會感覺到——大多數(shù)時候是一種出于本能的恐懼或懶惰——不管走到哪都沒法隨心所欲。放棄偽裝,按照理想中的標準行事,最終你會實現(xiàn)目標。

7. 奇跡

研究人員曾測算過,父母在某一時刻生下自己,也就是說現(xiàn)有DNA存在的概率——考慮到戰(zhàn)爭史、自然災害以及天下大亂——約為400萬億分之一。你目前擁有的一切皆是迄今為止宇宙中一切事物相互作用的結(jié)果。一旦意識到這一事實,便沒有理由再去游手好閑或自怨自艾,或被恐懼所困,沒有什么能阻止你努力完成來到世上的使命。你的人生本就是一個奇跡。

我的人生亦是如此。現(xiàn)在讓我們積極行動起來吧。(財富中文網(wǎng))

譯者:Pessy

審校:夏林

?

Every month I coach dozens of young people from around the globe who have no idea what they’re doing with their lives how to better plan their careers. Having found a number of common threads, I’ve put together some guidance for anyone seeking to determine their life’s purpose. Here are the main concepts to consider, distilled into seven key words:

1. Wants

Most of my clients have no idea what they want. Some have a story they tell themselves about what they’re doing or what they’re planning to do next, but they have no idea what they REALLY want.

What we really want can usually be identified once we stop censoring ourselves, trying to come up with an answer that sounds prestigious or glamorous or reflects what we think is economically feasible or what our family wants. I tell everyone: get all those things out of your head and then give yourself to the count of three to answer as quickly as possible “What do I want in life?” Nine times out of 10, that’s your answer.

Until you know what you want, no one else can help you get there. The first step starts in ruthlessly identifying what that is

2. Fear

If you still can’t come up with what you really want out of life, a good place to start is by examining what you’re scared of. I strongly believe that fear tells us what we should be doing and the most successful people proceed directly into what scares them.

Like most humans, everyone I work with is very scared of something – of many things actually. Instead of backing down in the face of those things, we tackle them head on. We look at it like, this is a lot of good stuff to put on your radar and start learning about how you roll in the fear zone.

Go where you’ll grow, and you’ll grow most when you’re really freaked out about something.

3. Service

If that doesn’t get the ball rolling, look for opportunities to give. What do you have that you can share with the world, regardless of monetary compensation? What can you teach others? Where might just your physical presence be a gift to someone in need?

Most unhappy people are living selfish lives without looking at the simplest question of all: What can I give to someone else? Today. Now. Whenever you feel lost, give, share, and love.

4. Connection.

I find that many people who feel stuck in life are failing to actively and strategically connect with others. Once I identify what someone wants, the next step is to make a list of all the people who can help him or her achieve it and then start methodically connecting with all of those people, personally asking each one for help or otherwise shamelessly putting their talents out there in front of them.

Again, most people are terrified to do this. And of course we must figure out how to do it appropriately and with a value proposition. We first need to work on our self-confidence to make it a reality. The fear of connecting with important people in a field of interest is precisely what holds us back from reaching the top.

5. Stillness

People tend to seriously underestimate the value of silence and stillness in their lives. They run around at 100 miles per hour every day, ingesting so much information and stimulation but never giving it time to settle in.

I tell each and every person I work with to sit and be completely still for half an hour every night before bed, a sacred time to turn off all the devices, get into pajamas, prepare the mind for rest, reflect on the day, and let the mind digest how the day shifted things around in its inner chambers. The heart can’t speak while the body is moving and the mind is restless, so we have to take these three steps: still the body, quiet the mind, and listen to the heart. Every day.

6. Acting

Most people are faking it. You have to do the same. You will feel one way – and most of the time it’s your animal brain screaming out in fear or laziness – but to go anywhere, you can’t just do what you feel like doing. Act like the person you dream of being, and eventually you’ll get there.

7. Miracle

Researchers estimate that the likelihood of YOU being born to your parents, with your set of DNA, in this particular moment in history – considering all the history of warfare and natural destruction and utter chaos – is about 1 in 400 trillion. Everything that has ever happened in the universe has brought you to this moment now. Once you wrap your head around that fact, it’s hard to sit back and feel sorry for yourself or let fear stop you from delivering on what you’re very clearly here for a reason to deliver to us. Your life is a miracle.

So is mine. Now let’s act accordingly.

財富中文網(wǎng)所刊載內(nèi)容之知識產(chǎn)權(quán)為財富媒體知識產(chǎn)權(quán)有限公司及/或相關(guān)權(quán)利人專屬所有或持有。未經(jīng)許可,禁止進行轉(zhuǎn)載、摘編、復制及建立鏡像等任何使用。
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