當(dāng)湯姆·漢克斯回顧他的人生和職業(yè)生涯時,他認為35歲是人生中最艱難的年齡。
漢克斯參加了《今夜娛樂》(Entertainment Tonight)節(jié)目,談?wù)撍男码娪啊哆@里》(Here)。他在電影中飾演了不同年齡的角色。漢克斯提到,“對我們來說,最難的是扮演35歲的時候?!?/p>
現(xiàn)年68歲的漢克斯表示,在這個年齡,“新陳代謝停止、重力開始拉扯你、骨頭開始磨損”?!敦敻弧冯s志采訪的專家表示,不只漢克斯發(fā)現(xiàn)35歲是一個艱難的人生階段。
35歲既不是最年輕的,也不是最年長的,這個年齡的人可能會因為財務(wù)和家庭責(zé)任而陷入人生低谷。
許多35歲的人會覺得他們的夢想與現(xiàn)實發(fā)生了沖突。博納菲德財富(Bone Fide Wealth)的認證理財規(guī)劃師兼創(chuàng)始人道格拉斯·邦帕斯對《財富》雜志表示,在這個年齡段財務(wù)壓力加劇,退休可能還遙不可及。
專注于千禧一代理財?shù)陌钆了贡硎荆骸?5歲可能是一個獨特的挑戰(zhàn),因為它通常是期望與現(xiàn)實發(fā)生碰撞的過渡期?!?/p>
常見的人生過渡期會增加壓力。
Monster的職業(yè)專家維姬·薩萊米表示:“在這個年齡段,人們可能開始組建家庭、購買房屋,還會經(jīng)歷……各種‘成人化’的人生大事。保持積極的態(tài)度,制定計劃,與他人交流、建立人脈等,對于應(yīng)對這些變化非常重要?!?/p>
普遍會出現(xiàn)職業(yè)倦怠
許多35歲的上班族通常有足夠長的工作經(jīng)歷可能取得一些成就,但與事業(yè)巔峰期又有很長的距離,因此他們可能感覺自己陷入了困境。
根據(jù)《福布斯》對1,000多名美國上班族的調(diào)查,千禧一代對他們的工作最不滿意。這并不奇怪,因為許多千禧一代擔(dān)任中層管理人員,眾所周知這個職位會帶來巨大的壓力。中層管理人員負責(zé)向團隊傳達辦公室的規(guī)定和其他不斷變化的文化規(guī)范,因此這個群體近來報告的職業(yè)倦怠程度最高。
職場專家兼Workplace Intelligence主理合伙人丹·施瓦貝爾補充道:“在35歲時,許多職業(yè)人士發(fā)現(xiàn)自己要平衡職業(yè)發(fā)展與日益增加的工作責(zé)任,他們通常面臨著獲得領(lǐng)導(dǎo)崗位或?qū)崿F(xiàn)長期職業(yè)目標(biāo)的壓力。”
邦帕斯指出,許多人可能來到一個臨界點,他們意識到自己想要改弦易轍。
對于這個人生階段,他說道:“在這個時期,人們可能會感覺職業(yè)發(fā)展存在壓力,或者意識到他們所走的道路可能與他們的長期抱負不一致?!彼_萊米支持這一觀點,她解釋稱在這個年齡段,人們通常準備改變職業(yè),這令人興奮,“但可能會令人望而生畏?!?/p>
即便如此,這個年齡段并非全都是厄運和悲觀。亞利桑那州斯科茨代爾市康納斯財富管理公司(Conners Wealth Management)的創(chuàng)始人兼總裁史蒂文·康納斯指出,35歲的成年人“正處于他們的黃金工作年齡”。他補充說,35歲距離傳統(tǒng)退休大約還有30年,他們正處于一個理想的位置,可以增加儲蓄,并為他們的工作做出更多貢獻。對于這些成家不久、職業(yè)發(fā)展加速但距離退休還有很長時間的成年人,他建議他們保持樂觀,他說:“相反,要感到興奮。距離40歲生日(或中年危機)還有5年時間。”
沒有時間放松
即使35歲的人終于有了喘息的機會,他們可能也無法放松。畢竟,他們正處于一個生活成本高昂的階段。
而且,這個典型的艱難時期,對千禧一代來說似乎更加艱難。千禧一代通常背負了學(xué)生貸款并面臨不合時宜的經(jīng)濟衰退,這代年輕人買不起房,并且還要與現(xiàn)金充裕的嬰兒潮一代競爭。事實證明,財富積累并不容易,因為70%的Z世代和千禧一代學(xué)生借款人對銀率網(wǎng)(Bankrate)表示,由于債務(wù),他們推遲了做出重要財務(wù)決策的時間。
僅僅負擔(dān)自己的生活方式就已經(jīng)很困難,這在某種程度上導(dǎo)致了一些人不生育孩子。而全國性危機的加劇,導(dǎo)致有孩子的家庭要面臨高昂的托兒費用。根據(jù)美國兒童保育意識組織(Child Care Aware of America)的一份報告,在每個州,托兒費用高于房屋租金,因為兩個孩子在中心的托兒費用比平均年租金高出25%到100%以上。
盡管面臨各種挑戰(zhàn),千禧一代仍然堅持不懈,并取得了進展。但他們?nèi)匀豢赡芨械綁毫?,因為他們要在未來生活、財富積累和家庭規(guī)劃等方面努力平衡支出。邦帕斯解釋說:“在財務(wù)上,35歲的人更加重視購房、養(yǎng)育子女或退休儲蓄等重大生活開支,隨著責(zé)任的增加,他們往往會感覺這些開支更加沉重?!?他補充說,人們在這個年齡也會開始出現(xiàn)健康問題。
《釋放工作中的快樂》(Unlocking Happiness at Work)一書的作者詹妮弗·莫斯對《財富》表示:“在這個年齡,幾乎沒有時間照顧自己,你的所有時間都圍繞著照顧別人而不是自己。這是一個令人筋疲力盡的時期,許多人會思考人生的意義何在?!彼玫囊豁椦芯拷忉屃诵腋8芯拖褚粋€U形曲線,在中年時下降,而且最近對青年的調(diào)查顯示幸福感大幅下降。
對于漢克斯而言,他認為自己“現(xiàn)在的狀態(tài)更好”,因為孩子們都長大了,他有更多的時間鍛煉和享受美食。西北大學(xué)家庭研究所(Family Institute at Northwestern)的心理咨詢臨床副教授克魯利斯博士同意這些做法是“在任何年齡段改善身體狀況的關(guān)鍵”。
她補充說,盡管這個年齡段可能會有成長的痛苦,但也可以是一個反思的好時機。她補充說:“我認為三十多歲可能是人生中非常激動人心的時期,因為這是一個成熟的個體擁抱自我、走自己的路并學(xué)會如何應(yīng)對逆境的時期?!保ㄘ敻恢形木W(wǎng))
譯者:劉進龍
審校:汪皓
當(dāng)湯姆·漢克斯回顧他的人生和職業(yè)生涯時,他認為35歲是人生中最艱難的年齡。
漢克斯參加了《今夜娛樂》(Entertainment Tonight)節(jié)目,談?wù)撍男码娪啊哆@里》(Here)。他在電影中飾演了不同年齡的角色。漢克斯提到,“對我們來說,最難的是扮演35歲的時候?!?/p>
現(xiàn)年68歲的漢克斯表示,在這個年齡,“新陳代謝停止、重力開始拉扯你、骨頭開始磨損”?!敦敻弧冯s志采訪的專家表示,不只漢克斯發(fā)現(xiàn)35歲是一個艱難的人生階段。
35歲既不是最年輕的,也不是最年長的,這個年齡的人可能會因為財務(wù)和家庭責(zé)任而陷入人生低谷。
許多35歲的人會覺得他們的夢想與現(xiàn)實發(fā)生了沖突。博納菲德財富(Bone Fide Wealth)的認證理財規(guī)劃師兼創(chuàng)始人道格拉斯·邦帕斯對《財富》雜志表示,在這個年齡段財務(wù)壓力加劇,退休可能還遙不可及。
專注于千禧一代理財?shù)陌钆了贡硎荆骸?5歲可能是一個獨特的挑戰(zhàn),因為它通常是期望與現(xiàn)實發(fā)生碰撞的過渡期?!?/p>
常見的人生過渡期會增加壓力。
Monster的職業(yè)專家維姬·薩萊米表示:“在這個年齡段,人們可能開始組建家庭、購買房屋,還會經(jīng)歷……各種‘成人化’的人生大事。”保持積極的態(tài)度,制定計劃,與他人交流、建立人脈等,對于應(yīng)對這些變化非常重要?!?/p>
普遍會出現(xiàn)職業(yè)倦怠
許多35歲的上班族通常有足夠長的工作經(jīng)歷可能取得一些成就,但與事業(yè)巔峰期又有很長的距離,因此他們可能感覺自己陷入了困境。
根據(jù)《福布斯》對1,000多名美國上班族的調(diào)查,千禧一代對他們的工作最不滿意。這并不奇怪,因為許多千禧一代擔(dān)任中層管理人員,眾所周知這個職位會帶來巨大的壓力。中層管理人員負責(zé)向團隊傳達辦公室的規(guī)定和其他不斷變化的文化規(guī)范,因此這個群體近來報告的職業(yè)倦怠程度最高。
職場專家兼Workplace Intelligence主理合伙人丹·施瓦貝爾補充道:“在35歲時,許多職業(yè)人士發(fā)現(xiàn)自己要平衡職業(yè)發(fā)展與日益增加的工作責(zé)任,他們通常面臨著獲得領(lǐng)導(dǎo)崗位或?qū)崿F(xiàn)長期職業(yè)目標(biāo)的壓力?!?/p>
邦帕斯指出,許多人可能來到一個臨界點,他們意識到自己想要改弦易轍。
對于這個人生階段,他說道:“在這個時期,人們可能會感覺職業(yè)發(fā)展存在壓力,或者意識到他們所走的道路可能與他們的長期抱負不一致?!彼_萊米支持這一觀點,她解釋稱在這個年齡段,人們通常準備改變職業(yè),這令人興奮,“但可能會令人望而生畏。”
即便如此,這個年齡段并非全都是厄運和悲觀。亞利桑那州斯科茨代爾市康納斯財富管理公司(Conners Wealth Management)的創(chuàng)始人兼總裁史蒂文·康納斯指出,35歲的成年人“正處于他們的黃金工作年齡”。他補充說,35歲距離傳統(tǒng)退休大約還有30年,他們正處于一個理想的位置,可以增加儲蓄,并為他們的工作做出更多貢獻。對于這些成家不久、職業(yè)發(fā)展加速但距離退休還有很長時間的成年人,他建議他們保持樂觀,他說:“相反,要感到興奮。距離40歲生日(或中年危機)還有5年時間?!?/p>
沒有時間放松
即使35歲的人終于有了喘息的機會,他們可能也無法放松。畢竟,他們正處于一個生活成本高昂的階段。
而且,這個典型的艱難時期,對千禧一代來說似乎更加艱難。千禧一代通常背負了學(xué)生貸款并面臨不合時宜的經(jīng)濟衰退,這代年輕人買不起房,并且還要與現(xiàn)金充裕的嬰兒潮一代競爭。事實證明,財富積累并不容易,因為70%的Z世代和千禧一代學(xué)生借款人對銀率網(wǎng)(Bankrate)表示,由于債務(wù),他們推遲了做出重要財務(wù)決策的時間。
僅僅負擔(dān)自己的生活方式就已經(jīng)很困難,這在某種程度上導(dǎo)致了一些人不生育孩子。而全國性危機的加劇,導(dǎo)致有孩子的家庭要面臨高昂的托兒費用。根據(jù)美國兒童保育意識組織(Child Care Aware of America)的一份報告,在每個州,托兒費用高于房屋租金,因為兩個孩子在中心的托兒費用比平均年租金高出25%到100%以上。
盡管面臨各種挑戰(zhàn),千禧一代仍然堅持不懈,并取得了進展。但他們?nèi)匀豢赡芨械綁毫?,因為他們要在未來生活、財富積累和家庭規(guī)劃等方面努力平衡支出。邦帕斯解釋說:“在財務(wù)上,35歲的人更加重視購房、養(yǎng)育子女或退休儲蓄等重大生活開支,隨著責(zé)任的增加,他們往往會感覺這些開支更加沉重?!?他補充說,人們在這個年齡也會開始出現(xiàn)健康問題。
《釋放工作中的快樂》(Unlocking Happiness at Work)一書的作者詹妮弗·莫斯對《財富》表示:“在這個年齡,幾乎沒有時間照顧自己,你的所有時間都圍繞著照顧別人而不是自己。這是一個令人筋疲力盡的時期,許多人會思考人生的意義何在?!彼玫囊豁椦芯拷忉屃诵腋8芯拖褚粋€U形曲線,在中年時下降,而且最近對青年的調(diào)查顯示幸福感大幅下降。
對于漢克斯而言,他認為自己“現(xiàn)在的狀態(tài)更好”,因為孩子們都長大了,他有更多的時間鍛煉和享受美食。西北大學(xué)家庭研究所(Family Institute at Northwestern)的心理咨詢臨床副教授克魯利斯博士同意這些做法是“在任何年齡段改善身體狀況的關(guān)鍵”。
她補充說,盡管這個年齡段可能會有成長的痛苦,但也可以是一個反思的好時機。她補充說:“我認為三十多歲可能是人生中非常激動人心的時期,因為這是一個成熟的個體擁抱自我、走自己的路并學(xué)會如何應(yīng)對逆境的時期。”(財富中文網(wǎng))
譯者:劉進龍
審校:汪皓
As Tom Hanks reflects on his life and career, 35 stands out as the most difficult age.
Speaking with Entertainment Tonight about his new movie Here where he played a range of ages, Hanks noted that the “the hardest for us was when we were playing 35.”
It’s the “time when your metabolism stops, gravity starts tearing you down, your bones start wearing off,” Hanks, now 68, said. Experts interviewed by Fortune say Hanks isn’t alone in finding the mid-thirties age difficult.
Neither the youngest or oldest kid on the block, people in their mid-thirties might be going through a bit of a slump with financial and family responsibilities setting in.
Many 35 year olds might feel their dreams collide with reality. Financial pressures intensify, and retirement might feel far out of sight Douglas Boneparth, certified financial planner and founder of Bone Fide Wealth, told Fortune.
“Age 35 can be uniquely challenging because it’s often a transitional period where expectations meet reality,” Boneparth, who specializes in millennials finances, said.
Common life transitions can add pressure.
“This is around the time when people may start having families, purchasing a home, and more…full-on ‘a(chǎn)dulting’ sets in,” Vicki Salemi, career expert at Monster, said. “It’s important to stay positive, have a plan, talk to people, network, and more, to navigate these changes to move forward.”
Career ruts are common
Often long enough to make some headway, but not far enough to reach a point of full power— many mid-30s workers might feel like they’re in a bit of a rut.
The current cohort, millennials, are the least satisfied in their jobs, according to a Forbes survey of more than 1,000 U.S. workers. It’s no wonder given that many of them are middle-managers, a position known for creating great levels of stress. Said managers have recently reported even higher levels of burnout given their current role to communicate office mandates and other shifting cultural norms to their team.
“At age 35, many professionals find themselves balancing career advancement with increasing responsibilities at work, often facing pressure to achieve leadership roles or pivot toward long-term career goals,” Dan Schawbel, workplace expert and managing partner at Workplace Intelligence, adds.
Many might have a breaking point, where they realize they want to change paths, notes Boneparth.
“It’s a time when people may feel pressure to advance further in their careers or realize that the path they’re on might not align with their long-term aspirations,” he says of the life stage. Salemi backs up this sentiment, explaining that this is often a point where people become ready for a career change, something that is exciting “but could feel daunting.”
Even so, it’s not all doom and gloom. Adults at this age “are in their prime working years,”Steven Conners, founder and president of Conners Wealth Management in Scottsdale, Arizona, notes. About three decades from traditional retirement they’re in an ideal spot to save more and contribute more to their job, he adds. Urging optimism for those with a young family and seeing their career accelerate while facing a long time until retirement he says,”be excited instead. Your 40th birthday (or mid-life crisis) is still five years away.
No time to unwind
Even when 35 year-olds finally catch a break, they might not be able to unwind. They’re in an expensive life-stage, after all.
And this typically difficult period seems to be hitting millennials all the more hard. Often hit with student loans and facing ill-timed recessions, young adults of this generation struggled to afford housing and have found themselves competing with cash-flush baby boomers. Wealth building proves difficult, as 70% of Gen Z and millennial student borrowers report to Bankrate that they’ve put off making important financial decisions due to their debt.
Simply affording their own lifestyle proves trying, which has, in part, contributed to some not having children. Those that do have kids have found themselves hit by high childcare costs as exacerbated by a nation-wide crisis. In every state childcare costs more than rent, as the cost of center-based care for two kids was more than average annual rent payments by 25% to over 100%, according to a report from Child Care Aware of America.
Millennials have persevered, making gains despite it all. But they’re still probably stressed as they’re juggling expenses for the future, wealth building, and family planning. “Financially, it’s the age when major life expenses like homeownership, raising children, or saving for retirement come into sharper focus, often feeling more burdensome as responsibilities pile up,” explains Boneparth, adding that there are health concerns that start to kick in at that period as well.
“At this age, there is little to no time for self-care and your whole world is wrapped up in taking care of everyone but yourself. It’s an exhausting time of life that makes many wonder, what’s the point,” Jennifer Moss, author of Unlocking Happiness at Work, told Fortune, referencing a study that explained happiness is like a U-curve that dips in middle adulthood and recent surveys of youth that show a major decline in well-being.
Hanks, for his own part, believes himself to be “in better shape now,” referencing his kids growing older and his heightened ability to exercise and eat better. Dr. Kerulis, associate clinical professor of counseling at the Family Institute at Northwestern, agrees that said practices are “key to improvements at any age.”
She adds though that the age, while it might have growing pains, can be a good time of reflection. “ I would argue that one’s 30’s can be a very exciting time in life because it is a time to embrace oneself, step into one’s own way of being, and learn how to manage adversity as a mature individual,” she added.